


A Very Baeksoo Christmas

by zannen



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Ambiguous Relationships, Attempt at Humor, Attempted Seduction, Canon Universe, Christmas, Drabble Collection, Established Relationship, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Meet-Cute
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-22
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-11 02:38:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 7,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8950627
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zannen/pseuds/zannen
Summary: A small collection of holiday-themed Baeksoo drabbles written at the last minute for Christmas. Tags are in no particular order; titles are intentionally ridiculous.





	1. Santa Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Kyungsoo wants is peace and quiet. For two minutes. Baekhyun? Not so much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by a post over at [OTP Prompts](http://otpprompts.tumblr.com/post/154425345824/person-a-has-their-hands-wrapped-around-a-warm-cup).

“Hey. Wanna come sit on Santa’s lap and find out if you’ve been a good boy?”

Kyungsoo tears his gaze away from the window to find Baekhyun leaning against the doorframe, in what is ostensibly meant to be a seductive pose. All he’s wearing is a pair of red and white briefs and—

“Antlers? Really?” Kyungsoo takes a sip of the peppermint hot chocolate Jongdae made, shooting Baekhyun an unimpressed look over the rim of the mug.

“I could make a joke here about being horny,” says Baekhyun, reaching up to adjust the headband, “but actually, horns have an external layer of keratin and antlers are made of bone and velvet, so it wouldn’t be—”

“Baek, I appreciate your dedication to scientific accuracy,” Kyungsoo cuts in. “But you’re really not helping yourself here.”

“You don’t like my festive look?”

Kyungsoo shrugs. “It’s cute, I guess?”

“Cute?” Baekhyun squawks. “I’m practically naked, and you think it’s _cute?_ Our relationship can’t be that stale already, come on.”

“If you’d done without the antlers or terrible pickup line, I might’ve responded differently.”

Baekhyun pouts, his sexy pose turning into a lazy slouch. “What do you have against a little roleplay?”

“There’s nothing sexy about Santa, Baek.”

“But I’ve got—”

“Oh my god,” comes Minseok’s voice from outside the room. “You know other people live here, right?”

Baekhyun looks over his shoulder. “I’m in Kyungsoo’s room, get off my dick,” he calls.

“Your barely-clothed ass is visible from the dining area, you little shit. I want it gone by the time I’m done in the kitchen.”

“Bite me.”

Minseok’s only response is an exasperated noise before his footsteps lead away into the kitchen. Kyungsoo can hear the clatter of pots and pants being moved about.

Apparently Baekhyun is in a reasonable mood. He moves fully into the room and shuts the door behind him, then stands with his hands on his hips, eyes full of mischief. He’s grinning, too, which is always a bad sign. Kyungsoo just wants to drink his cocoa and gaze wistfully out into the night. That’s all he wants. No weird schemes from his boyfriend.

“I’m not doing holiday-themed roleplay,” Kyungsoo says flatly.

Baekhyun’s grin widens.

“I’m really not,” Kyungsoo insists. “No amount of reindeer antlers or weird Christmas-related dirty talk is gonna convince me.”

“I thought you might say that, so I came prepared.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t want to encourage him, but he’s kind of curious to see what doubtlessly dumb thing Baekhyun has planned. He sighs. “With what?”

He lifts his mug to his lips right as Baekhyun begins to answer, something he comes to regret when Baekhyun cheerfully says, “A festive butt plug!”

Kyungsoo’s hot chocolate spills onto his lap, making him yelp in surprise. Baekhyun tuts.

“Not really the kind of hot and wet I was hoping for,” he says. “But if it gets you out of your clothes faster, that’s good enough, I guess.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (By "festive" he means it has red and white candy cane stripes.)


	2. DTF (down to fight)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Park Chanyeol has never had a good idea in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [i'm sorry](http://edens-blog.tumblr.com/post/134930895369/fun-christmas-idea)

“Who even hung this here?” Baekhyun frowns up at the sprig hanging above them.

“I have no idea,” says Kyungsoo. He looks around. “Jongdae?” he calls.

“What?” Jongdae whines in reply before shuffling into view. “I was trying to—oh my god.” His face lights up with glee. “This is perfect. The best possible outcome.” He whips out his phone and starts texting quickly.

“Why is there mistletoe in our dorm and why is it decorated with a black ribbon and skulls?” Baekhyun asks.

“It was Chanyeol’s idea,” says Jongdae. “He read about it somewhere. It works like normal mistletoe, except—nah, I’ll just have him explain it when he gets here.”

Minutes later, everyone is crowded in their living room, with Chanyeol standing in the center and looking like Christmas has come early—by about three days. Most of them seem curious—except Jongin, who’s rubbing his eyes tiredly like he’s been woken from his daily nap, and Junmyeon, who looks preemptively disapproving.

“Here’s how it works,” says Chanyeol. “When two people meet under this particular branch of mistletoe, instead of kissing…” He pauses dramatically. “They have to _fight_.”

“Mistle _foes_ ,” Jongdae chimes in. Junmyeon gives him a distraught look, like he’s torn between appreciating the bad pun and wanting to reprimand Jongdae for going along with this.

“Like physically fight each other?” says Kyungsoo, eyebrows shooting upward. “That’s stupid, I’m not fighting a guy who’s kicked people unconscious.”

“I’m not technically supposed to fight people who aren’t also martial arts practitioners anyway,” Baekhyun says, arms folded over his chest. “It’s unethical or some shit.”

“You have to fight,” Chanyeol says gravely. “Look, I don’t make the rules here—”

“You actually did kind of make these rules?” says Jongin, bleary-eyed and leaning tiredly against Sehun. “It was your idea?”

“I didn’t come up with it! Someone on the internet did!”

Baekhyun groans. “Can’t we just kiss instead? Kissing is nice. No one can get concussed from kissing. And as someone who’s experienced fighting _and_ kissing, I have a definite preference.”

Chanyeol’s face falls. “But—”

“I don’t want to die just so you can be entertained for two seconds, Chanyeol,” says Kyungsoo.

Baekhyun bumps shoulders with him. “For what it’s worth, you definitely wouldn’t die,” he says. “I’d probably just let you win.”

Surprised, Kyungsoo turns to look at him. “Yeah? It wouldn’t wound your ego or anything?”

“I’ve taken a lot of beatings.” Baekhyun shrugs. “I bounce back pretty quick.”

“So you’re willing to fight him if he’s allowed to win?” Chanyeol says hopefully.

“I don’t want to win!” Kyungsoo protests.

“Just let them kiss,” Yixing says with a lazy smile. “Then everybody wins.”

“Especially me,” says Baekhyun. He winks when Kyungsoo gives him another look.

Chanyeol sighs. “Fine, be cute and kiss or whatever,” he grumbles.

Kyungsoo prepares himself for what he assumes is going to be a quick peck, but then Baekhyun leans in slowly, one hand curled against the nape of Kyungsoo’s neck and another settled on his shoulder, eyes falling shut when he presses their lips together. Kyungsoo makes a muffled sound of surprise before kissing back. His heart pounds. He grabs desperate fistfuls of Baekhyun’s shirt.

Someone clears their throat. “Anyway,” Junmyeon says, “we should get dinner. Somewhere that isn’t here. Right now immediately.”

Everyone murmurs in agreement and they hurry out of the dorm, leaving an oblivious Kyungsoo and Baekhyun to smile against each other’s mouths.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think a lot about how Baekhyun kicked a dude in the head once at a tournament and knocked him out and everyone was too afraid to fight him after that.


	3. If You Want to Destroy My Sweater (you shouldn't have given it to me as a Christmas gift, asshole)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Baekhyun is a terrible boyfriend, and Kyungsoo continues to dress poorly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of roughly inspired by [this](http://otpprompts.tumblr.com/post/154461351440/person-a-of-your-otp-gifts-b-a-hand-knit-ugly), sort of.
> 
> I forgot to mention this before, I think, but these are each exactly one page in Word. It's a creative exercise, I guess? Maybe?

Kyungsoo takes the gift out of the box and holds it up. “Oh,” he says. “It’s a sweater.”

“I made it for you!” Baekhyun beams—not because he’s particularly proud of his creation, but because he knows it’s hideous and wants to see how Kyungsoo reacts. “Do you like it?”

The actual quality of the sweater isn’t bad; it’s shaped nicely and devoid of awkward lumps, and the details are fairly intricate. Baekhyun put genuine effort into it, as he takes pride in his ability to knit competently. He’s been practicing a lot, working on little projects here and there when he has down time and doesn’t feel like losing at any games, and it shows.

So the thing that makes the sweater horrifically, unforgivably ugly isn’t the way it’s been made, but the entirely jarring color scheme: patterns of deep scarlet matched with a minty green, showing that green and red do not, in fact, always make for a Christmas-y combination. Off-white snowflakes decorate the lower half of the garment, and golden-yellow text across the chest reads HAPPY X-MAS. It’s so appalling that Sehun and Junmyeon looked ready to _weep_ when they saw it.

Kyungsoo gives it a scrutinizing look, then his features soften into a smile. “Of course,” he says. “You put time into making it for me. I love it.”

_Shit_.

There were two things Baekhyun didn’t take into account when he made this absolute abomination.

One: Kyungsoo is a great boyfriend. The best boyfriend in the known universe, probably. He’s thoughtful and cute and considerate, and he would never say or do anything to intentionally hurt Baekhyun’s feelings.

Two: Kyungsoo has the worst taste in clothing Baekhyun has ever seen.

He looks so unbothered by the idea of wearing this shitty sweater that Baekhyun feels his heart clench a little. He can’t admit that it’s a shitty joke and he’s just trying to be a dick, not when Kyungsoo’s eyes are so full of love and adoration.

“I’ll wear it every day,” Kyungsoo says.

_Double shit_.

True to his word, Kyungsoo wears that god-awful sweater every fucking day for a week. Which wouldn’t be too terrible, if not for the fact that he doesn’t just wear it around the dorm, oh no—he wears it to a promotional event.

In front of people.

With _cameras_.

It would be funny, if not for the fact that it’s _Baekhyun’s boyfriend_ out there who’s dressed in the ugliest thing known to man. Baekhyun gapes in horror at one of the pictures Chanyeol links him to from Twitter, with a message that says _You’ve officially killed Christmas_.

When Kyungsoo gets back to the dorm, Baekhyun drags him aside, fidgeting guiltily. Kyungsoo gives him a curious look and asks what’s wrong.

“Listen,” says Baekhyun. His phone buzzes in his pocket. He ignores it. “You know how I’m—kind of a dick who likes pranking people? And sometimes the pranks go a little too far?”

Kyungsoo’s lips twitch. “What about it?”

“The sweater was just a joke,” he blurts out. “It’s supposed to be shitty. You’re supposed to hate it. I really didn’t think you’d—”

“Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo stares at him with fond exasperation. “I know. I was waiting to see how long you’d let it go on for.”

“You knew? But—you were so—you looked so happy about it,” Baekhyun all but whimpers.

Kyungsoo pats him on the head condescendingly. “Please, Baekhyun. I’m an actor,” he says. He wrinkles his nose. “Now let’s burn this thing so I never have to look at it again, ugh.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Though honestly, a hideous Christmas sweater would not be the worst thing we've seen Kyungsoo wear in public...


	4. A Christmas Carol?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Kyungsoo would rather die than join Baekhyun's caroling group, and it may just come to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [this](http://brianasficprompts.tumblr.com/post/132716612000) prompt: "One member of your OTP is a Christmas caroler and the other is trying to hide from them by turning off all the lights but they know the other is home and won’t give up."

Baekhyun won’t seem to rest until Kyungsoo agrees to join their church’s fucking caroling group, and it’s _exhausting_.

Because he’s an idiot, Kyungsoo made the excuse that he wouldn’t even be home this year, that he had plans to visit his family and would be out of town for days, sorry, maybe next year? (Which is an empty promise anyway; he’ll just come up with another excuse next December. He really, _really_ doesn’t want to be a caroler.)

Except Kyungsoo _isn’t_ visiting family. He’s at home, curled up on his couch, curtains and blinds closed and all lights off and car parked somewhere down the street, just in case. Sweet songs echo through the neighborhood, but the sound might as well be air sirens for how Kyungsoo reacts.

There’s no way Baekhyun will know that he lied, he tells himself. It’s fine. He’s—

Someone knocks at the door. Kyungsoo freezes, a wave of fresh terror washing over him.

Maybe it’s someone else. He can still hear the carolers a few houses down, after all. It might be one of his neighbors, or Chanyeol, or a delivery person—

“I know you’re in there, you sack of dicks!”

Or not.

The best course of action is to do nothing, he thinks. Baekhyun will figure he isn’t home after all and give up, right? That’s how a normal, rational person would respond, isn’t it?

“I swear to _fuck_ , Kyungsoo, I will deck your halls so hard if you don’t answer this door.”

Baekhyun is not, unfortunately, a normal or rational person.

Here’s how it started: A while back, Kyungsoo was helping one of his elderly neighbors by doing some yardwork for her, because his mother raised him to be decent and helpful and unfailingly polite whenever possible. He was singing to himself as he worked, like he always does to make chores more bearable. Baekhyun—whom he barely knew at the time—happened to overhear as he passed during his late-morning jog.

“Wow,” Baekhyun had said, startling Kyungsoo into dropping the trowel he was weeding with. “You have a really nice voice. Way better than most of the church choir. Ever think about joining?”

“Thanks,” Kyungsoo had replied. “I don’t really have time for stuff like that, though.”

“What about the carolers? That’s just for a little bit in December. Hardly any commitment at all.”

Kyungsoo had said something like “yeah, maybe,” not mentioning that he hates everything about caroling. Baekhyun had never let that _maybe_ go.

Now, it takes a few more increasingly hostile (and weirdly festive) threats for Kyungsoo to realize that Baekhyun isn’t going anywhere, and if he wants to keep some semblance of peace in his neighborhood he’ll have to answer the door. So, against his better judgment, he does.

“ _You_ ,” Baekhyun seethes, jabbing a finger into Kyungsoo’s chest.

Kyungsoo finds himself adopting his signature deer-in-headlights look. “Me?”

“This is all your fault, you—you fucking—fuck.”

Kyungsoo squints. “Are—are you _drunk?_ ”

“No.” Baekhyun glares. “I _wish_ , but no.”

“Listen, I’m sorry I lied about th—”

“I don’t care about your lame excuses,” Baekhyun cuts in, prodding Kyungsoo’s chest again. “What I _do_ care about is how your shitty attitude rubbed all those fussy assholes from church the wrong way, so they started talking shit about you, and when I told all of them to eat a dick they _kicked me out of the group_. Hear that? I got _kicked out_. Of a fucking _caroling group_. For _you_.”

Kyungsoo flounders for a moment before saying, “I—sorry? But why would you—”

“Because I’m in love with your dumb face and dumb smile,” Baekhyun says miserably, “and I’ve been trying to get you to join this dumb group so we can spend more time together, okay?” and _oh_. That explains a lot, actually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun is just bad at expressing his feelings. Same, tho.


	5. Illumination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For once, the compromising position isn't completely Baekhyun's fault. Just mostly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a [photoset](http://witchoria.com/post/135684438582/lit) that caught my eye, and this was the tamest thing I could possibly write with that as inspiration.

Baekhyun’s grin looks halfway apologetic, like he already knows how tiresome this is. Kyungsoo just sighs, glances at the clock on the wall, then the bright string of lights trailing along his mattress.

It could be worse, he thinks. At least Baekhyun’s partially clothed, even if the coverage is… well, minimal.

“I lost a bet,” says Baekhyun.

“Of course you did,” Kyungsoo mutters. He doesn’t even bother wondering what kind of bet would lead to this. He’s too tired.

Baekhyun tugs at one end of the string, looking up at it thoughtfully. “You know, it’s actually not as uncomfortable as it looks,” he says. “I’ve had worse.”

“Oh, good,” says Kyungsoo. “Then I can leave you here while I find out who the fuck left you tied up on my bed with _Christmas lights_.”

“Okay okay, it’s not _that_ comfortable,” Baekhyun says quickly. “Help me out here? Please?”

Kyungsoo makes his way to the bed and starts carefully unwinding the string of lights on the far end, around Baekhyun’s left wrist. They aren’t wrapped too tightly, but the lights jutting out from between the coiled wires would make it difficult, if not impossible, for Baekhyun to pull himself free. They’re also, he notes with a frown, slightly warm from being plugged in. He wonders if Baekhyun was lying about the discomfort.

After Kyungsoo takes care of one hand, Baekhyun uses his available arm to push himself clumsily into a sitting position. “Cool, I can—”

“No, let me.” Kyungsoo circles around to the other side of the bed and pulls the trailing string of lights toward him, then slowly unwinds them from around the other wrist. He takes his time, since there’s more length to deal with now and he doesn’t want the lights to end up in a tangled pile for someone to deal with. Especially since that someone would probably end up being him, knowing his luck.

When he’s done freeing Baekhyun, he leans down to the outlet and pulls the plug, then starts looping the cords carefully—partly to get it over with and set them aside, partly to give Baekhyun time to leave with some of his dignity still intact. But there’s no movement from the bed, no sound of any kind.

He sets the ring of lights on his nightstand and turns to find Baekhyun staring at him strangely.

“What?” he says, then gets distracted by looking down. “Oh—let me see your wrists.”

He expects Baekhyun to argue or bat his hand away, but when Kyungsoo reaches out, Baekhyun extends one arm without complaint.

Kyungsoo keeps his grip gentle during his inspection, rubbing his thumb over the slight indentations on the skin. There are no visible marks otherwise, as far as he can see.

“Does it hurt at all?” he asks.

“Just a little sore. Same as after a night of LoL.”

Kyungsoo hums. He lets go of Baekhyun’s arm and gestures for the other one. It’s not because he thinks anything is wrong at this point; he just likes having the excuse to look at Baekhyun’s hands and the delicate bones of his wrists. He sees faint crescent marks on Baekhyun’s palm where he must’ve curled his hand into a fist. Kyungsoo lets his fingers brush over the marks carefully.

“Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun says quietly. His own fingers—long and elegant but slightly crooked, pretty but not perfect—close softly around Kyungsoo’s hand.

Suddenly struck with the absurdity of the situation, Kyungsoo laughs. “You’re wearing a G-string with a bow on the crotch, Baekhyun.”

“It wasn’t my idea,” Baekhyun says.

“I know.” Kyungsoo smiles. “Tell Jongdae this doesn’t count as my present, though.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I even feel the urge to write aftercare when no BDSM scenario has actually occurred, what is this


	6. Misdemeanor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sequel of sorts to "Santa Baby," but with 100% fewer references to reindeer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't seen their ["Unfair"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wl6KA_oXbDQ) stage on Music Core, you need to fix that immediately.

Normally, Baekhyun doesn’t care to revisit their old performance costumes. Some are nice enough—he was a fan of a lot of his “Lotto” costuming, and “Love Me Right” treated him well, too—but some are just cringey. Sometimes a little cringe is good, though, and he’s willing to be a little silly to brighten up Kyungsoo’s day.

“Why’d you leave a note in my room instead of texting me like a normal person?” Kyungsoo says from the other side of the door. He tries to turn the knob. “And why’s your door locked? Stop being weird, Baek.”

“Keep your panties on,” Baekhyun calls. “I’ll just be a sec.” He hangs the stethoscope around his neck for the finishing touch, looks at his reflection one more time, and skips over to the door.

“Finally,” Kyungsoo says as the door opens. “What are—”

He stops, gaping confusedly. His gaze quickly sweeps over Baekhyun’s whole ridiculous outfit, scrubs and white coat and all. Baekhyun grins.

“Did you have an appointment?” he says, fighting to keep a straight face.

“Is that the costume from ‘Unfair’? How did you—”

“I asked for some favors.” Baekhyun points back over his shoulder and says, “I’ve got yours, too. You can play the sexy police officer who’s questioning me about suspected malpractice. Then I can do some malpractice on you.” He waggles his eyebrows.

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes but can’t hide his smile. “This is the worst idea you’ve ever had,” he says.

“At least it’s not Christmas-themed this time?”

“True.” Kyungsoo reaches out and straightens Baekhyun’s fake stethoscope. “I’ll play along with the doctor thing, but I’m not putting on a costume.”

“No, come on, it’ll be fun!” Baekhyun is practically hopping in place. “I even made sure they included the club! Like, as a prop, not… not to use or anything.” He scratches his head. “I don’t think it would even be safe to use it? I dunno. It’s more for realism.”

“It was fun to wear it onstage,” says Kyungsoo, ignoring Baekhyun’s babbling, “but I sort of felt like a little kid playing dress-up. Not very sexy.”

“There’s really nothing sexy about the scenario anyway. We’re both gonna look stupid. But we’ll look stupid _together_ , Kyungsoo. And that’s what matters.”

Kyungsoo bites his lip and says nothing for a moment. “Fine,” he says eventually. “But no more roleplays after this, okay?”

“Deal.”

“That didn’t sound sincere.”

“It wasn’t,” Baekhyun promises.

Kyungsoo huffs. “Just give me the outfit and I’ll go change.” He frowns. “I hope no one sees me wearing this. I don’t need—”

“Alright,” Baekhyun says, shoving the garment bag in Kyungsoo’s face. “Go go go, before anyone else gets home.” He pushes a grumbling Kyungsoo out of the room and waits.

 

They lay on the rumpled sheets, Baekhyun’s head resting on Kyungsoo’s abdomen as they both stare up at the ceiling. Kyungsoo strokes Baekhyun’s hair absently.

“That was… interesting,” Kyungsoo says.

Baekhyun grunts in agreement, closing his eyes.

“I don’t think we should return the club. That seems… unsanitary.” Kyungsoo eyes the prop uncertainly. “Maybe you could just tell them you lost it or something.”

“You’re just saying that ‘cause you wanna keep it,” Baekhyun murmurs. “For future use.”

“No I—fuck off, Baek, go to sleep,” says Kyungsoo, ears and cheeks bright red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This... was not how it originally ended, idk how this happened honestly


	7. Closets: Good for More Than Just Hiding Presents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Almost a fake dating AU, but also not one at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by #21 from [this](http://alloftheprompts.tumblr.com/post/134349883493/25-days-christmas-romance-challenge) list.

“Alright, come clean,” Kyungsoo says once he’s cornered Baekhyun in the kitchen. He crosses his arms sternly, leaning back against the kitchen counter and giving Baekhyun a look that says he won’t take any shit. “You aren’t really dating my sister, are you.”

Baekhyun laughs nervously. “What are you talking about? Of course I—”

“You didn’t look upset when you were put in separate rooms.” Kyungsoo holds up a finger. “You keep looking over at her and going to hold her hand or put your arm around her, like it’s something you have to remind yourself to do.” Another. “You sound awkward as hell when you use pet names—”

“Maybe I’m just awkward with affection,” says Baekhyun. “You don’t know.”

Kyungsoo’s eyes narrow. “My theory,” he says, “is that either your relationship is failing and you’ve fallen out of love with each other, or you were never dating to begin with. Either way, I know you’re hiding something. What I want to know is why.”

Baekhyun clucks his tongue. “You’re a really suspicious person, you know that? Maybe you should try to be more trusting. Might be happier in the long run.”

“Cut the crap, Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo says in a tone that implies _if that’s even your real name_.

“Look, this isn’t—you should be asking _her_ about it, okay? It’s not my place to tell.”

There’s a stubbornness in the set of Kyungsoo’s jaw, like he doesn’t especially want to take Baekhyun’s suggestion but knows he should. He gives him the stink eye for another long second before saying, “Fine. But I’m not done with you.”

Baekhyun holds back a groan as Kyungsoo leaves the kitchen. He should never have agreed to this. Pretending to be someone’s boyfriend for the holidays so her family doesn’t find out she’s a lesbian is easier in theory than in practice. Especially when he’s known about her being gay for the entire time they’ve been friends, ensuring that he’s never thought of her in a romantic context.

And to make matters worse, her brother is distressingly good-looking, and there isn’t a single goddamn thing Baekhyun can do about it.

He can’t blame Kyungsoo for being as suspicious of Baekhyun as he is. Any good brother would be. And even though Kyungsoo looks about as sturdy as a piece of paper and would probably have trouble winning an arm wrestling match against a middle schooler, Baekhyun would not, under any circumstances, want to piss the guy off.

Figuring Kyungsoo had told him to stay put, Baekhyun rummages around in search of something to drink, ultimately settling on the leftover eggnog in the fridge. Mrs. Do went a little heavy on the rum, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing in Baekhyun’s opinion.

It takes a small eternity for Kyungsoo to return, at which point Baekhyun is pleasantly buzzed but still kind of miffed over having to wait so long. He raises his eyebrows at Kyungsoo, who looks surprisingly contrite.

“So?”

“Thanks,” Kyungsoo says. “I mean—for not telling me. And for helping her out. And sacrificing your Christmas and stuff.”

Baekhyun shrugs, says, “Eh, I didn’t have any plans anyway.” It’s not a lie. Kyungsoo’s sister isn’t the only one afraid of what their family thinks.

An awkward silence settles, neither of them even looking at each other. After a few too-long moments, Kyungsoo says, “To be honest, I was annoyed about you pretending to date her at first.” He pauses. “It felt like—like a waste, I guess.”

“Oh?” Baekhyun licks his lips. He feels his pulse picking up. “Why’s that?”

“Because—” Kyungsoo looks flustered, uncertain. “I wanted to kiss you from the moment you walked through the door. That’s probably not appropriate, but I’m—”

“I wouldn’t complain if you did,” Baekhyun says quickly, causing Kyungsoo to blush and stutter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I avoided ever giving his fictional sister a name--or even an age--because I didn't want to have to make one up or genderbend anyone or deal with OCs being a thing. She can be anyone. Use ur imagination, friends.)


	8. Limited Edition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Baekhyun's got 99 problems, and a majority of them come from being short.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was actually inspired by a drabble someone else wrote! It's in [The Space In Between](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5371739/chapters/12854349) by noraebangbang, a really great collection if you like BTS. c:
> 
> Also, the only thing that is definitely true in this fic is the fact that the Imperial Star Destroyer was retired by LEGO. Everything else is probably just lies and wishful thinking.

At four years old, Baekhyun’s niece is at a stage where she knows precisely what she wants and will be an absolute wreck if she doesn’t get it. What she wants now is Star Wars. Specifically, a Star Wars LEGO set. Even more specifically, the formerly retired Imperial Star Destroyer set—which clearly says it’s intended for children ages nine to fourteen—that’s being sold again for a limited time this Christmas and will probably disappear from existence on December 26th. So Baekhyun has to buy it now, or he’ll be on the kid’s shit list forever.

Thing is, the box is on the top shelf, and Baekhyun would rather climb the shelves himself and risk death by LEGO avalanche than ask an employee for help.

“Which one are you thinking about?” someone says behind him.

He turns, ready to tell another hapless worker that he doesn’t need help, but the person his eyes land on isn’t wearing a uniform or lanyard. It’s a guy with wide eyes and a puffy coat that looks two sizes too large, hanging loosely from his small frame. He’s even shorter than Baekhyun, a fact that probably shouldn’t feel as satisfying as it does.

“The Star Destroyer,” says Baekhyun. “I keep hoping I’ll spontaneously develop telekinesis if I stare at it long enough.”

The guy chuckles. “Been there,” he says. “You could order it online, save yourself the trouble.”

Baekhyun sighs. “It won’t deliver in time. And if my brother’s kid doesn’t have this waiting for her under the tree on Christmas morning, I’m dead. I’ll be labeled the worst uncle ever and then burned at the stake, probably.”

The stranger hums. “Have you tried using one of the stepladders?”

Baekhyun narrows his eyes. “What stepladders?”

“They’re around. Supposed to be for employees, but—” A shrug. “I use them all the time.”

“Can’t you get in trouble for that? It’s a safety hazard, right?”

“They tried to yell at me once, but apparently they’d thought I was a kid, and when they realized I wasn’t they felt so awkward they dropped it.” The stranger grins. “Perks of being small, I guess.”

There’s a stepladder folded up against the side of a nearby shelf. They grab it and set it up quickly. The tiny stranger promises to keep watch while Baekhyun grabs the box, though Baekhyun’s main concern isn’t a disgruntled toy store worker so much as the possibility of falling just a few feet from the top of the ladder and cracking his skull in front of some (kind of cute) guy he just met. He forces himself not to look down as he climbs.

“Actually,” the stranger says suddenly as Baekhyun starts to go back down the ladder, “could you grab one for me, too? While you’re up there?”

Baekhyun blinks. “Sure. Just take this one,” he says, handing over the box.

“Thanks.”

He goes to get another one and asks, “You got an eager kid to please, too?”

“Um. No, I’m just… a collector, kind of?”

“Oh.” Baekhyun pauses, new box in hand. “Like you keep them around in mint condition and shit, or you build them and have them displayed?”

“Neither. I build them for fun and then take them apart later. It’s. Relaxing, I guess?”

Once Baekhyun is safely back on the ground, he looks at the stranger and sees him fidgeting nervously, self-consciousness overflowing. The cuteness squeezes Baekhyun’s heart a little.

“That’s cool,” he says, smiling. “My niece is gonna build hers and then throw it off the stairs.” The guy half-smiles back, and Baekhyun tucks his box under one arm to extend the other. “I’m Baekhyun.”

The guy shakes his hand. “Kyungsoo.”

“Well, Kyungsoo, if you want a LEGO-building partner, I’d be happy to give you my number.”

(The surprising thing isn’t even that Baekhyun tried to pick up a guy this way, but that it _worked_.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ssstrychnine](archiveofourown.org/users/ssstrychnine): "you should write twelve and pretend like you did it for the twelve days of christmas"
> 
> If I end up posting twelve of these by the end of tomorrow, you'll know who to blame.


	9. Dog Won't Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Jongin is the laziest wingman. Mongryong is a fat puppy. Things that shouldn't work out somehow do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ssstrychnine wrote a fic once about [Baeksoo and puppies](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7604278) that you've probably read, and if you haven't you definitely should.

“Everyone looks fifty times cuter when they’ve got a cute dog with them,” Jongin had said. “I get asked for my number all the time when I’m out walking the kids.”

Kyungsoo tried to argue that he was pretty sure it was just because Jongin himself was already stupidly attractive, but it fell on deaf ears. And then Jongin started talking about how depressing it was to be single around the holidays, and this was definitely something they had to fix, so Kyungsoo, only somewhat against his will, was given an armful of poodle and practically shoved out the door.

He looks down at Jjanggu, who’s trotting along happily on the sidewalk in his tiny sweater, no doubt looking for ways to make Kyungsoo’s life hell. (Jongin’s logic had been that Jjanggu liked him best, which is bullshit. It’s _Jjangah_ who favors Kyungsoo. This is all probably just a ploy to get Jjanggu to exercise more, really, since Jongin’s always complaining about the poodle’s weight.)

Despite the frosty air assaulting his skin and overall inconvenience of everything, though, Kyungsoo isn’t having too bad of a time. The cool, smoky smells of winter are comforting to him, make him think inexplicably of being a kid. And he likes scarves and coats, likes the idea of possible snow and early nights and getting home to a warm fireplace. So the walk isn’t that bad.

Partway into the walk, Jjanggu’s running and skipping slows to an uncharacteristically easy pace. Kyungsoo regards the dog with concern.

“Are you cold, little guy?” he murmurs, then feels ridiculous for talking to an animal as though it can understand him.

He stops at a bench, wincing when the cold seeps through his jeans, and lifts Jjanggu into his arms. He opens his coat partway and stuffs the just-small-enough dog into it. Jjanggu yips in what Kyungsoo hopes is approval.

“This is just until you warm up a little,” he says. “I don’t want you freezing your paws off.”

Jjanggu wiggles and pants in response.

They’ve been on the bench a few minutes when a stranger pauses and says, “That’s honestly the cutest thing I’ve seen all week, dude.”

The stranger, who looks sunny and boyish and not unlike a puppy himself, is holding a leash attached to a pudgy corgi. If the presence of the other dog bothers Jjanggu at all, he doesn’t show it.

“I felt bad for him,” says Kyungsoo. “And, I mean, it’s my friend’s dog, so I have to try especially hard to keep him from dying of exposure.”

The boxy grin and light chuckle the stranger gives him make Kyungsoo’s insides feel warm in spite of the winter air and frozen bench. There’s just something about the smile in the man’s eyes, the way he holds himself, the brashness of his voice, that Kyungsoo finds he really likes.

“Lucky friend,” says the stranger, and Kyungsoo isn’t really sure what he means by that, but then he asks, “Mind sharing your bench? This lard ball and I could use a break.”

Kyungsoo considers Jjanggu, who hasn’t even reacted to the corgi’s presence because he has a limited number of fucks to give, and shrugs. “Go ahead.”

After the stranger sits down (fat corgi flopping on the ground nearby and panting happily), he pulls off his knit cap to reveal a head of silvery-white hair that leaves Kyungsoo feeling slightly weak. Then he tugs at the knot of his scarf to loosen it, letting out a heavy breath.

“Working out in the cold sucks,” he says, and Kyungsoo can sympathize. But then, Kyungsoo doesn’t care for exercise in general. “So how’d you end up walking your friend’s dog? Altruism?”

Kyungsoo considers a number of excuses before settling on the truth. “He thinks me being seen with a cute dog will help me be less pathetically single. According to him, dogs make people look way more attractive.”

The stranger tilts his head. “I dunno if that’s true,” he says. “I think you’ll probably look just as cute without the poodle. But after we trade numbers, you can tell him his theory was right anyway.”

“Oh. Yeah, that sounds—yeah. Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My """"research"""" for this one involved staring at pictures of Jongin's dogs confusedly for a really long time. A+ use of time, 10/10, would recommend.


	10. Snowpocalypse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. A small blizzard occurs and Baekhyun is dramatic about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From [this](http://a-u-prompts.tumblr.com/post/133731330506/blakesmilitiaim-always-a-slut-for-a-christmas) prompt list: “we’re strictly ‘platonic’ but we’re snowed in omg we’re gonna have to repopulate the earth”

There’s even more snow outside now than there was the last time Baekhyun checked. He stares out the window anxiously as the flakes continue to fall, gusts of wind sending them spiraling like a snow globe. It would be kind of pretty if it weren’t a terrifying wasteland of frosty death.

Fucking blizzard. Fucking _winter_.

“We’re gonna be trapped forever,” he says.

“No, we’re not,” Kyungsoo mutters from the couch.

“It’s gonna be like _Snowpiercer_ ,” Baekhyun continues. “We’ll have to resort to cannibalism. Or if we survive, we’ll have to repopulate the Earth, because everyone outside is dead.”

“First of all, this is nothing like _Snowpiercer_. And second, with what uterus are we accomplishing that, exactly?” Kyungsoo says, sounding halfway amused but also ten kinds of done. “Do you just have one lying around?”

“We’d find a way.”

“Why would we _want_ to?”

“Listen,” Baekhyun says, spinning around to fix Kyungsoo with a look of mock solemnity. Kyungsoo glances up from his manhwa, peering just over the thick rims of his glasses with raised eyebrows. “This is no laughing matter, Kyungsoo. We may be the last people alive on Earth. It’s our duty to repopulate and save the human race from extinction.”

“Save humanity through inbreeding? Have you ever taken a science class?”

“Pfft, who needs _science_.”

“Anyway, if everyone else on the planet _did_ die in the small blizzard outside,” Kyungsoo says in his Humoring Baekhyun’s Dumb Jokes voice, “then according to you, our only options as the last living humans are to eat each other or have sex.”

“Repopulate,” Baekhyun corrects.

“Baekhyun, even if you did find some magical way for one of us to bear children, I’m not having ass babies with you.”

Baekhyun sniffs. “Well, when you put it _that_ way.”

“But if we’re just talking about whether or not I’d sleep with you if we were the last men on Earth—” Kyungsoo pauses, makes a face Baekhyun can’t quite read. “That’s a weird question.”

Something twists unpleasantly in Baekhyun’s stomach. “Is it?” he says, his voice going up a few terrible octaves.

He was just joking, but if Kyungsoo’s going to be real about this, then it’s not a conversation Baekhyun thinks he wants to have. Especially not if Kyungsoo finds the idea of sleeping with Baekhyun _weird_. Trapped in their apartment in the middle of a blizzard, there’s nowhere he can escape to, nowhere for him to hide from the uncomfortable truth.

Kyungsoo frowns, and Baekhyun’s feeling of dread gets that much worse.

“It’s a weird thing to ask because it wouldn’t even have to come to that?” says Kyungsoo. “We wouldn’t have to—are we not on the same page here?”

Baekhyun shakes his head slowly, eyes wide.

“Oh. I thought it was obvious.” Kyungsoo straightens on the couch, dropping the manhwa volume onto one cushion. “You really didn’t know it was mutual? I haven’t tried very hard to hide the fact that I like you, Baekhyun.” His lips curl into a small smile. “And you haven’t done a good job, either.”

Baekhyun just gapes stupidly. “You never—no, that wasn’t obvious at all, what the fuck?”

“Well, either way, it’s out there now.” There’s a gentle look in Kyungsoo’s eyes. “You don’t have to be the last person on Earth for me to say yes to you, Baekhyun. You can be one in seven billion and the answer’s the same.”

“Oh.” A beat of silence. “So is repopulation still off the table, or—”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If mpreg is possible, Kyungsoo sure as shit doesn't want to find out.
> 
> I'm gonna try to post one more tonight and another tomorrow? I guess? Maybe? man idek


	11. All I Want for Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AU. Follow-up to "A Christmas Carol?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chordae_tendineae requested a sequel, so here it is!

“Baekhyun, come on.”

“Baekhyun’s not here, sorry, bye.”

Kyungsoo lets out a heavy sigh. “Is that how it’s gonna be? Really? Alright, fine, we can just talk through the door, I guess.”

There’s no sound from the other side of the door, which means Baekhyun hasn’t walked away. That’s something, at least. Still, it would be better to have this conversation face-to-face—less impersonal and awkward, less public.

“I hope you didn’t freak out and run away because of something I did,” he says. “I was just… surprised. _Really_ fucking surprised. I wasn’t expecting you to come to my house and start yelling at me and then confess to me. And I definitely didn’t expect you to kiss me. Especially—” His face warms at the memory. He tries to swallow back his sudden feeling of shyness. “Especially not like that.”

He leans on the doorframe, resting his head against the wood. “I don’t want you to think my reaction was negative. It was all really sudden. Not _bad_ , just. Really out of left field. Plus, I thought you _hated_ me.” He chuckles. “So can you blame me for not knowing how to respond at first?”

Silence. Kyungsoo stares down at the floor, picks at a loose thread on the sleeve of his coat. “I’m not mad at you, Baekhyun. And I didn’t mean to not kiss you back. I would’ve if I’d—I dunno. Been more prepared, maybe. I’m sorry. Please open the door.”

The door finally opens a little. Kyungsoo looks up to find Baekhyun, flustered and anxious, peering at him through the gap.

“Sorry,” Baekhyun mumbles. “For kissing you and shit. It always works in movies.”

“It works in real life sometimes, too,” says Kyungsoo. “But usually it helps when the person you’re kissing has time to figure out what’s going on.”

Baekhyun licks his lips. “Yeah. That’s fair.”

“So can we sit down and talk about this? Without me having to whine at you through a wall and risk being overheard by everyone in your building?”

“I’m in my pajamas.”

“That’s fine.”

“They’re bunny pajamas,” Baekhyun tells him, and Kyungsoo just says, “Okay.”

Baekhyun pulls the door open wider and shuffles back to let Kyungsoo in. Sure enough, his pajamas are pale blue and decorated with little rabbits. It’s kind of incredibly adorable.

They make their way into the small apartment’s kitchen area and sit on opposite sides of the table. Kyungsoo’s chair creaks. Baekhyun is staring so intensely at his hands that he’s nearly burning holes in them. There’s a warm and sugary smell wafting about, and it makes Kyungsoo regret skipping lunch to drive over here. But he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about Baekhyun since last night: his earnest frown, his mouth, the agitated rumble of his voice, the warmth of his hands, his _mouth_.

“The thing is,” he says, “I don’t know you well enough to like you. Not for real. But I’d like to,” he adds quickly at Baekhyun’s dejected expression. “I want to get to know you. Without having to join any stupid choral things. God, I really fucking hate carolers, Baekhyun.”

“I kind of do too, honestly,” Baekhyun admits. “Part of me thought that having a hot guy join up would make it more bearable. But it’s not worth it anyway.” He glances up at Kyungsoo with shy eyes. “So… despite the fact that I’m a complete embarrassment who can’t talk to guys and hides at home in his pajamas when he fucks up, would you be interested in… dating? Just. Casually. Maybe not even dating, but—hanging out? I don’t know. You’re really hot and I’m being an idiot.”

Kyungsoo grins. “Do you think I would come to your apartment on Christmas to talk about feelings if I wasn’t interested? I was serious when I said I would’ve kissed you back, you know.”

Baekhyun blinks, mouth hanging open. “Oh shit,” he says. “It’s Christmas?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way too long to write. Hrmm.


	12. A Miracle in December

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soulmate AU. Having _Merry Christmas_ inked on his skin has made Baekhyun a bit of a cynic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I completely cheated. This breaks the "one page per drabble" rule and is nearly 1k in length. But whatever, it's Christmas, who cares :D

Everyone assumes Baekhyun is a Christmas person. And maybe he would be, under normal circumstances. Except there are two words etched on his arm that make that impossible.

 _Merry Christmas_.

They’re Soul Words, the first thing his supposed soulmate will say to him. That should be exciting, should make him _ecstatic_ about the holidays. But after he turned eighteen, after the Words appeared, it took two Decembers for him to get tired of it. A person can only hear their Soul Words from the wrong mouth so many times before they lose their bright-eyed optimism, and Baekhyun’s are both so common yet _so specific_ that it was too easy for him to get his hopes up time and time again.

So fuck Christmas, and fuck soulmates. He doesn’t need more of that disappointment in his life.

He’s waiting for a train to take him across town and back home after Junmyeon’s Christmas party, tired and irate and tipsy from too much wine. Every “Merry Christmas!” thrown in his direction earns a scowl and a “Yeah, thanks” through gritted teeth. He doesn’t have the energy to care about the dirty looks they throw him.

The train, often late on a good day, is running later still because of the snow and ice, and because it’s fucking _Christmas_ and everything’s more hectic than usual. Baekhyun hates the holiday, hates this weather, hates the train for running late, and hates how his scarf is wet from how much he’s breathed into it. The moment he pulls the fabric away, though, his sore nose protests against the cold.

When the train _does_ appear, it’s so packed that “standing room only” doesn’t even apply. Baekhyun is just pissy enough that he knows he can’t be squished like a sardine without wanting to outright murder someone, so he glares one last time at the train and decides to walk.

He keeps his head down, avoids meeting anyone’s gaze in case they try to talk to him. His pace is brisk and determined, fueled by his hatred of the cold and need to get home at any cost. Which would be fine, if the weather didn’t decide five minutes into Baekhyun’s walk that it needed to step up its game and become completely fucking impossible to deal with, snowflakes flying in the wind like little pellets of death.

He ducks into a bus stop, cursing everything in the universe. There’s one other person already there, curled up in a shivering ball on the opposite end of the bench. He feels a pang of sympathy. If he weren’t freezing his own ass off, he’d offer his hat or gloves. He thinks about Jongdae, who’s always carrying hand warmers and things like that, just in case someone needs them.

Ten minutes later, Baekhyun finds himself regretting ever having left the train station. The streets are covered in a thick blanket of white. He’s not sure at this point how he’s supposed to get _anywhere_ , let alone back to the warmth of his apartment. He’s started thinking about looking for a more permanent place to take shelter when he hears the loud and fast crunch of someone running through snow.

The runner skids to a stop under their little shelter, small and panting and dressed head to toe in a puffy black coat that makes them look like a fat penguin. There’s a backpack on their shoulders, also black. Now relatively safe from the elements, they stumble over to the bench, fall heavily down onto it, and pull their hood back, revealing a man who looks even more exhausted than Baekhyun feels. The wind and snow have left his face rosy and dusted with white.

Still panting heavily from the run, he glances over at the guy at the other end of the bench, then turns the other way and locks eyes with Baekhyun, who forgets to look away. The guy smiles wryly, eyes almost too pretty and cheeks too cute, and says tiredly, “Merry Christmas.”

Baekhyun huffs out a humorless laugh. “Yeah, Merry fucking Christmas,” he mutters.

The guy’s pretty eyes go wide, suddenly all whites. That look of surprise is familiar to Baekhyun; it’s one he’s felt himself make dozens of times. The sight of it now makes his heart stop.

“Are you…?” He can’t finish the question, just glances at the man’s left arm.

“I think so,” the man says. “I’m—wait, before I forget.” He takes his backpack off and swings it onto his lap. After a moment of rummaging around, he pulls out a couple of hand warmers and turns to the other guy. “Here, you look like you need these.”

After giving the packets to the grateful and shivering man, the person who may well be Baekhyun’s soulmate turns and beams at him so brightly that Baekhyun, normally confident and unwavering, feels a little shy.

“Hi,” the man says. “I’m Kyungsoo, and I think we might be soulmates.” He pauses, blinking his big, owlish eyes. “Oh—do you want some hot tea? I have a thermos full of it in here.”

Baekhyun, who hates Christmas and snow and had almost stopped believing in the idea of soulmates, just nods, struggling to find his voice. “Y-yeah,” he manages. “That would be great, thanks. Um—I’m Baekhyun.” Then, “Sorry you had to have ‘fucking’ on your arm this whole time.”

Kyungsoo giggles—fucking _giggles_. “It’s alright. Sorry for making Christmas hell for you,” he says.

“It’s fine,” Baekhyun says, surprising himself when he realizes he means it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for the kind words and support! I hope you're all having a cozy and safe holiday season. ♡


End file.
